Saturday, December 19, 2015

Success or Lack There of, for NFL Teams Coming Off a Bye Week


One common thread of insight in NFL analysis is that teams coming off a bye week have an advantage against their opponent. The reasoning behind this theory is the extra week of rest allows the team to recover from injuries and scheme for the upcoming opponent. When given two weeks to watch film and prepare of an opponent's defense an NFL coaching staff should be able to develop the strategies needed to between them. However, I was never convinced that the bye week actually gave teams an advantage. So, I decided to look into the data from all 32 NFL teams over the five season between 2010-2014 (2015 was excluded because when I created the data set there were still teams that hadn't had a bye). I wanted to know if the conventional wisdom was right.

Friday, December 18, 2015

Shootyhoops Basketmakers: The NBA's Most Fuckable


NBA PILFs

It only takes a few games before any basketball fan starts to think of the most important factor in one’s enjoyment of the sport: which NBA players do I most want to fuck?  There are a thousand factors in any basketball game, for both the players and fans, but this is the question at the core of the very sport.  Many have gone insane trying to rank every NBA player, while men like Mike Fratello long ago realized exactly who was their number one PILF and refuse to let any know, lest they lose their chance at glory.
For new fans, this can be a daunting hurdle to overcome in basketball fandom.  Granted, it is much easier to simply abandon the sport than work out if Thabo Sefolosha is more sexually attractive than Damon Stoudamire.  These are important questions and questions that must be answered.  Any society that believe itself to be advanced absolutely must consider which of its basketball players are the most fuckable.  Certainly, this is a much easier question when thought of as a singular answer; that is, there must be only one correct answer to this, as only one NBA player is truly who you want to fuck. 
If this were true, there would be no problem at all: the answer is Chandler Parsons.  However, this ignores the real issue here.  Every NBA player needs to be ranked by how fuckable they are in comparison to their fellow professional basketeers.
Is personal taste involved in such a question?  Is it a completely subjective idea that cannot have a perfect answer?  No, of course not.  There are very exacting standards that must be agreed upon by all and cannot be argued in any way.  Fuckability is objective, especially in NBA players.  If you believe otherwise you are the devil.
For the layperson looking to be laid by a person, there are a few important parameters to keep in mind.  The rankings listed below[1] follow a very well thought out and not at all ridiculous set of measurements as to just why one player is more desirable than another.  This is a scientific study done for the good of mankind.  About which NBA player you would rather fuck.

Monday, December 7, 2015

Shootyhoops Basketmakers: The 1977-78 Philadelphia 76ers


The Pinnacle of Basketball

The 70s were a time when just about no one cared about basketball for any number of reasons.  It was a time with a number of strange characters in the league but no real legendary teams or players, at least for the most part.  This is, however, due to most people overlooking what was the greatest collection of basketball players to ever exist.  I am talking, of course, about the 1977-78 Philadelphia 76ers[1].
To understand the beauty of the 76ers, one must start at the top: Julius Erving.  The founder of Orange Julius and the first medical doctor to play in the NBA, Erving could do just about anything he wanted on the court.  Famously, Erving was able to hold the ball out of bounds as he leapt along the baseline and still twist it around for a layup.  This was an amazing feat, especially considering that he would leap along one baseline before blinking out of existence and reappearing in mid-air beneath the opposite basket.  His physical gifts were so that it still boggles the mind to see what he was able to accomplish.  He also had a significant afro, even in an era of afros.  Even Darnell Hillman admitted that yes, that is a pretty good afro.

Friday, December 4, 2015

The No Longer Invincable Legion of Boom

It is amazing how fast things can change in the NFL. Just last year, 2014, the Seattle Seahawks defensive secondary was so feared in the NFL that teams developed game plans that excluded long passing, shut off whole sides of the field, or just gave up on trying to throw all together. Heck, even this year in week 3 the Chicago Bears decided that their best chance to beat the Seahawks in Seattle was having their QB Jimmy Clausen pass only nine times in the first half. The Legion of Boom, the Seahawks secondary, was feared. In nine short weeks the Legion's reputation has been completely shattered. They have gone from being feared to being a weakness teams try to exploit.

In week twelve, the 49ers decided to have Blaine Gabbert throw 34 times. Gabbert completed passes of 31 and 36 yards. In last weeks game against the Pittsburgh Steelers Ben Roethlisberger threw it 55 times for 456 times for a passing yards record at CenturyLink field. The Steelers completed passes of 41 yards, 40 yards, and 69 yards. They attempted several other big pass plays that fell incomplete. The 49ers and Steelers obviously had no fear of the Seahawks Legion of Boom.

The reason for the change in reputation is this season string of agonizing fourth quarter collapses. Before the Steelers game every quality quarterback that had played the Seahawks had been able to beat them with passing in the fourth quarterback. Watching Rogers, Dalton, Newton, and Palmer were all able to march own the field and score at will against the previously impenetrable Seattle pass defense. Watching the Seahawks fail has obviously given opposing teams confidence in their ability to beat them in the air.

There are lots of theories for why the Seahawks secondary is worse. It could be Kam Chancellor hold out. It could be the promotion of Kris Richard from secondary coach to defensive coordinator. Maybe Richard Sherman and/or Earl Thomas are still suffering from last seasons injuries. Personally I think it is the price of paying three All Pro level talents (Sherman, Thomas, and Chancellor) has caught up with the Seahawks and prevented them from field a competent corner beside Sherman or nickelback in passing situations. Cary Williams and Marcus Burley are clearly worse than Byron Maxwell and Walter Thurman.

Whatever the reason the Legion of Booms aura of invincibility if clearly gone. Fans can no longer rest assured that any fourth quarter lead is safe. I hope the Seahawks front office regains their magic touch and figures out a solution to return them to their dominance this off season.