Things More Likely than the Seahawks Winning the NFC Championship

You, dear reader, may have heard that the Seahawks had a 3.9% chance of winning the NFC Championship with four minutes left in the game.  This is an undesirable percentage, and one seen pretty commonly by anyone that has watched the Mariners in the last ten years (baseball zing!).  However, the Seahawks never quit.  They always compete, etc. etc.  All of the cliches apply here.  More importantly, the Seahawks are both very, very good and very, very lucky.

To truly demonstrate just how amazing it is that the Seahawks are in the Super Bowl after how that game was going, take a look at this highly scientific list of things more likely than the Seahawks winning last week.

• The New York Knicks winning any basketball game
• The New York Knicks playing said basketball game while wearing knickerbockers
• Kevin Durant taking all his endorsement money and founding a new Seattle SuperSonics team
• Jimmy Hoffa being alive
• Jimmy Hoffa being a cyborg police officer in future Detroit
• Any NHL player getting mentioned on ESPN at any time
• Any U.S. president, chosen randomly, having attended Harvard
• Someone hearing that George W. Bush went to Harvard and not laughing openly
• All of us actually living in the Matrix
• The San Francisco 49ers actually being named the 94ers since their inception but being too polite to correct anyone
• Jim Harbaugh greeting you calmly and cordially, then inviting you to his hot yoga class
• The Seahawk beating the Green Bay Packers
• The sea gaining sentience, learning football, and beating the Green Bay Packers
• The Patriots playing by the rules established by the NFL